why selah roi?

Selah Roi. 

Thirteen years of dancing with exuberance to 
thirteen years of dying by existence. 

Living but languishing with 
worsening health issues and
consequential dream burials.

How did Jesus expect me or anyone 
to rise from a grave? 

A switch of careers and seasons of sickness later,  I faced myself in the mirror to meet a woman overtaken by ‘what if’s’ since countless cries for restoration remained unanswered, 
despite immense strife and intellectual merit. 

But when my outlet of expression 
vanished after a severe back accident,
 a part of me died;
killing my passion and ability to live boldly 
in my King, my Roi. 

I never would’ve defined myself as 
an anxious person. 
the ballet studio was my home and 
stage performances were how 
i loved to captivate audiences.  

It’s a precious commodity. 

Health.

But when my outlet of expression 
vanished after a severe back accident,
 a part of me died;
killing my passion and ability to live boldly in my King, my Roi. 

A switch of careers and seasons of sickness later, 
I faced myself in the mirror to meet 
a woman overtaken by ‘what if’s’ since
countless cries for restoration remained unanswered, 
despite immense strife and intellectual merit. 

Selah Roi. 

For through perseverance training I was tried, 
but with pen on paper, 
and the Spirit at work in a King’s daughter, 
a ‘P’ lettered land was created so that 
myself and others could embrace our journeys and 
the most invaluable prize in
a never before seen stride. 

A practice of redefining how I would dance and the rebuilding of confidence that comes from a 
combination of strategic trust steps. 
In the back-and-forth of listening and talking to Jesus, 
a holy emblazoned faith arose to 
secure an unshakable peace and purpose. 

Selah Roi. 

A command to stop and praise for a 
communing that enlivens the most 
seemingly insignificant or panic-stricken days. 

Selah Roi. 

Planning to pause was more than a 
'breather stress reliever'; 
it was a compilation of present productive moments to 
defeat the relentless onslaught of mind-body-soul battles. 
In the proclamation of God’s promises - 
words with covenantal sealing - 
I overcame fear with a faith that was 
uncompromising. 


I may have been in the wilderness, 
but my mind did not have to be 
A prisoner to its persecuting. 
I was to break my mental down spiraling and  bring back health through a concerted faith focusing. 

Resurrection summarized in two words of specific meaning and instruction for keeping:
"expend your energy evaluating 
Me and My workings, 
weighing worship against worry and
trading wonder for wandering."

Resurrection summarized in two words of
specific meaning and instruction for keeping:
"expend your energy evaluating 
Me and My workings, 
weighing worship against worry and
trading wonder for wandering."

I may have been in the wilderness, 
but my mind did not have to be 
A prisoner to its persecuting. 
I was to break my mental down spiraling and 
bring back health through a 
concerted faith focusing. 

Planning to pause was more than a 
'breather stress reliever'; 
it was a compilation of present productive moments to 
defeat the relentless onslaught of mind-body-soul battles. 
In the proclamation of God’s promises - 
words with covenantal sealing - 
I overcame fear with a faith that was uncompromising. 


A practice of redefining how I would dance and the
rebuilding of confidence that comes from a 
combination of strategic trust steps. 
In the back-and-forth of listening and talking to Jesus, 
a holy emblazoned faith arose to 
secure an unshakable peace and purpose. 

For through perseverance training I was tried, 
but with pen on paper and the Spirit at work in a King’s daughter, 
a ‘P’ lettered land was created so that myself and others could embrace our journeys and the most invaluable prize in a never before seen stride. 

shop the planner

hallelujahs in unplanned times.

A life of prevailing by reflecting and uplifting

Friends, if I could leave any piece of advice for your faith journeys it would be that in your search to know God and His heart fuller, you would be brutally honest in your questions that stem from hardship while you seek His presence for wisdom and wholeness. There have been weeks in my grief when I couldn't open my Bible, and that was okay. There were months I didn't have the capacity to meditate on more than a single phrase or verse of God's word at a time, and that was absolutely understandable. And there were also moments in the mix of those soul conditions when I chose to trust with the faintest spirit and smallest willingness: God is faithful to stay by my side, holding me as I weep, lifting me up as I wrestle with this broken and beautiful life. 

Remaining in God's presence isn't about how many scriptural promises you can repeat to your angry and weary soul in the worst of worst circumstances. Abiding with your Heavenly Daddy is bringing Him whatever raw emotions are flowing out of your bleeding heart because He will meet you there and redeem the impossible. It may seem counterintuitive to run to Him when His ways have you begging for mercy and relief. However, in your unfiltered vulnerability with the King of Kings Himself, you will find a safe refuge who sows harvest from heaving sobs of despair. 

My prayer is that whether or not you've accepted Jesus to be your anchor of hope for eternal salvation as well as earth-shaken days, you would persevere in your quest of Him and find rest in this world's tension of struggle and sorrow, mourning and mending. In our asking for God's love to be made known in and through our individual stories, we let Him slowly transform our heart's perspective and receive freedom from the unimaginable, this side of heaven. 

Selah Roi is just one of many tools to help you hold onto the Lord with the weakest of faith grips. If you find yourself in a place of spiritual disequilibrium, perhaps this 'Hills and Valleys' sermon by Pastor Tim Holley will minister to your specific crisis and offer reason to lean into your anguish without “abandoning who you are,” or fully deconstructing your faith. Although we cannot expect our faith to be void of trial or difficulties, we can expect our relationship with Jesus to deepen as we commit to staying in His presence with and especially in our gravest emotions. 

A Faith that Doubts

why selah roi